How To Heal For Good With 0% Spiritual Bypassing
The healing journey is messy and can be quite painful. Most of us are afraid of going back to our unresolved childhood woundings. To protect us from any emotional upheaval, our brain will do anything. If we give into the brain’s temptation to stay on the surface, we actually prolong our healing journey because we never really get to the core of it. In this way, both Dan and Aleah, we have spent years spiritually bypassing our pain. We ran from one workshop to another in hope to finally feel better. However, it was only once we addressed the core pain, that things started to shift. So we created The Royal Path, which allows you to reprocess your old woundings in 0% spiritual bypassing mode.
Get our free ebook now to embark on your healing journey – because healing is no longer optional.
What is Spiritual Bypassing?
John Welwood, a Buddhist teacher and psychotherapist, first coined the term spiritual bypassing in the early 1980s. It defines “the tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds and unfinished developmental tasks.”
Spiritual bypassing is a great defense mechanism and serves to regulate unbearable emotional upheaval. With that mechanism, we actually bypass where it really hurts. If we want to break through that, we have to turn towards the painful, that you feel resistance towards, the unwanted and the scary. To do this we must cut through a couple of layers such as our numbness and defenses, pacing ourselves in the process and not think of it as something we have to be able to do a certain way. Healing work is messy work and you get to your goals faster if you slow down properly.
Spiritual bypassing brings us away from our pain and issues, but also from our authenticity & integrity. Click To Tweet
Spiritual bypassing can be very subtle and sometimes hard to detect or acknowledge, but here are some signs:
- Focusing on helping and saving others to avoid dealing with one’s own issues
- Intellectualizing higher truths, ideas and concepts
- Overdone niceness
- Delusion of having arrived at a higher level of consciousness
- Being superficial
- Using mediation, yoga or breathwork to escape unpleasant emotions
Spiritual bypassing is not necessarily unhealthy when chosen consciously to cope with acute stress (Fox, J.; Cashwell, C. S.; Picciotto, G. (2017)). However, if it is used constantly to sidestep the real issue at hand then we have to take a closer look at it as it keeps us spiritually immature. That is if our intention is to heal the psychological Mother Wound.
Unfortunately, with repression and denial being in place we often remain blind and unaware of how much we are prisoners of our past. The truth is that relationships don’t have to be dysfunctional, love and passion doesn’t have to get lost and life is not one of chronic unhappiness and unfulfillment.
However, if we want to change, we have to understand that healing is no longer optional, and that as long as we are suffering in our inner world, we automatically bring suffering to our outer world and there with to the people around us. In our experience, at the root of individual human suffering, too often, lies one universal trauma – the pyschological mother wound.
Healing The Psychological Mother Wound
Unresolved wounding will have us unconsciously recreate our painful childhood realities over and over again. We will at all cost keep chasing after the things we never got, but always needed and longed for. The results of that are difficulties, fears, challenges and mental health problems. The most underestimated wounding of it all being the early absence of secure love, giving birth to a universal trauma and a society full of normal neurotics.
The early absence of secure love creates the psychological mother wound. Secure love means to be loved – when and how we needed to be loved – & to be acknowledged, seen and validated in our being and feelings. Not having had our mother’s (and later on father’s) nurturing love, precisely when and how we needed it, created a pain so deep that it actually resembles one of dying.
Not only have we (Aleah & Dan) experienced those feelings in our own process, but we observed it with our clients too. We, as well as our clients, have consciously «gone back there», feeling the pain of not feeling loved and cared for and it allowed us to conclude the grieving process that brings deep lasting healing.
The Creation Of The Royal Path
So now we know what we need to heal. Let’s look at the how we are actually going to achieve that.
It took us a while to create a sincere and lasting transformative healing approach. Without a doubt, after the years of spiritual bypassing we both did, we finally landed at an approach that changed everything for us. We went to do Primal Therapy at the Arthur Janov Primal Centre in Los Angeles. Primal Therapy is not for everyone, but it is perfect for healing the psychological Mother Wound. We took those elements and the experience of our own processes and added a couple of missing bits and pieces to create our own healing method called Emotional Recycling.
If you research the definition of recycling, you will find the following explanation: “returning something to a previous state”. One could say to its essence, right? What is the true essence of a human being? It is certainly not fear, frustration, resentment, hopelessness, anger etc..
The true essence of a human being is love. Click To Tweet
Emotional Recycling
Our signature deep healing method is a holistic approach to shifting from living in defense to living in your essence. It considers the various layers we have to navigate through to safely access the deeper layers of our wounding and heal them in a way that is sustainable, lasting and empowering. Anytime we feel triggered and therewith disconnected from love, we recycle it back into a state of love. We do that through the allowing of the feelings (the emotions) that created the disconnection in the first place. The entire process is laid out in detail in this blog post and you will find an overview in our free ebook “How to heal for good with 0% spiritual bypassing” as well.
Ending Spiritual Bypassing and Becoming Comfortable With Emotional Discomfort
In all this work, in the end, the goal is to become much more comfortable with emotional discomfort and that is the opposite of spiritual bypassing. It is challenging, but very rewarding. In our own experience; once you become comfortable with your vulnerability, nothing will ever seem so hard anymore as you truly mastered a very important human skill.
Remember that repression works both ways: if you repress the uncomfortable, you automatically repress the exquisite feelings too, remaining numb. Click To Tweet
A Lasting Healing Experience
Through repeated Emotional Recycling sessions healing for good is absolutely possible, as long as we commit to our healing. Healing in general means to no longer be controlled by our wounds that unconsciously sabotage our life, relationships and emotional wellbeing. You know you have healed enough, once you no longer get triggered so much. You feel more capable of doing life, you feel uplifted for most of the time and your reality starts to show up in the way you want to. That includes healthy relationships happiness, joy and a feeling of wealth in so many ways.
Your Options To Embark On Your Personal Healing Journey and Heal for Good
EBOOK
Get our free ebook “How to heal for good with 0% spiritual bypassing” and start right now.
1ON1COACHING
Book your one on one deep dive journey: For at least 3 months we will have weekly sessions to teach you the methodology. Together we will re-create access to your feelings so you can start exploring where you need healing. This is for the brave ones who want to go for it and just look for the most efficient and lasting solution.
RETREATS
Come to one of our retreats: The power of group exposure is incredible. Meet other brave people who come to sit with you in your vulnerability and who want the same as you do. This will be a truly exceptional human experience, as you will get so many powerful imprints that will change your life forever and gift you with new like-minded friends.
BOOK
Get our book: Our book will come out in summer 2021. It will be your healing bible, and contain everything in detail. Theory combined with practical approaches that will kickstart your personal healing journey. It will be like nothing you have ever read before.
GROUP COACHING
Join one of our group coaching programs: These are small group coaching programs to ensure enough individual time with either Aleah or Dan. The intimacy we will create will allow you to enjoy a safe and honest container to do the work together.
The true essence of a human being is love. Click To Tweet
We hope you enjoyed reading this and maybe got some new insights.
Get in touch with us, if you like to!
Yours, Aleah & Dan
Important Links:
- Free ebook “How to heal for good with 0% spiritual bypassing”
- Who we are and what we do
- Check out our podcast
- Book your free discovery call
- Our Retreats
- 1 on 1 Coaching
- Blog post about Emotional Recycling
- Blog post about Spiritual Bypassing
- Blog post about The Psychological Mother Wound
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